- (no subject)
- June 21st, 2009
A lot of people I know seem to be getting married. Like people from work or people I knew in high school and college. I guess I am starting to get to that age where my friends are going to start getting married and having kids.
So far, all of them are having big weddings and as I watch them make their plans I guess I begin to feel more and more like having a big wedding is just not necessarily a good idea, at least not for me.
Most of the girls I know who are doing these wedding plans, they get just... so obsessed. They talk about it all the time and it seems more and more to me that it's the wedding that is important and not so much the marriage. Don't get me wrong, I am sure they are all very much in love but in my opinion the wedding is about... the couple and not about a huge party and the bridge being the main focus.
Before I met Correl, I definitely wanted a huge wedding. Now, I don't. For me, I wouldn't want to lose focus of what the wedding is really about, and it's about us, being together forever. I think if I had a big wedding, it'd just take over my life, become an obsession and then when it's over, I'd be... sad? Kind of like when you have a normal party and when everyone leaves it's just sort of sad because the event is over. That's how my New Years parties always felt. Like I'd spend so much time planning the party and then suddenly it's over.
Ok, so part of thinks it'd be great to have a nice and big wedding, I don't know if anyone has ever heard of Hotel DuPont, but it's this gorgeous hotel in Delaware that just has your ultimate fantasy wedding hall...SO gorgeous and yeah... SO expensive. Would I want to put myself into debt over ONE day?
So, what I am pretty sure I am going to do is get married in Maui. Go to the Maui Westin and just bring some close relatives and friends and do it. No bridesmaids, no massive wedding, just parents, grandparents and maybe aunts and uncles (Correl has SO many though, I only have one that'd show up), and friends (Adrianna, Sarbani, Rob, Roseann). I want to celebrate my marriage with those who are very close to me and not people who I haven't seen for 2 years...
Correl and I have talked about marriage. We want to, we are each other's lives... I think we both feel a little reluctant being both of our parents are divorced. It's hard to have any faith in marriage after seeing what your parents went through. Neither of my parents have even remarried but his has and they both seem happier with their current spouses. But will there ever be an ideal time? For that matter, will getting divorced really feel that much worse than breaking up? For me, there is so much emotional investment already and of course it'll grow stronger whether or not we are married. A marriage is only a contract yes, but I guess I like the idea of being "Mrs. Roush" and having a husband to grow old with and have children with. You can say you'll be together forever as a couple but I think the real commitment starts when you're married. It's really scary but so exciting.